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Old 10-23-2017, 08:07 PM   #1
slik
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Michael Bay set for live-action "Dora The Explorer" (2019)

You can't make this shit up:

http://collider.com/dora-the-explore...e-michael-bay/

Quote:

What a world we live in. What a time to be alive. Michael Bay will be producing a live-action "Dora The Explorer" and possibly direct as well. While story details are being kept under wraps, the live-action film will reportedly center on a teenage Dora, who moves to the city to live with her cousin Diego. Paramount is keen on the project and eyeing a 2019 release date, which means the wheels should start spinning on this one pretty fast.


Dora the Explorer ran on Nickelodeon from 2000 to 2014, following the adventures of a bilingual American Latina and her monkey, Boots, as they solved puzzles and riddles.
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Old 10-23-2017, 08:31 PM   #2
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*checks calendar*

*sees it's October 23rd not April 1st*

FUCK THIS PLANET
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Old 10-23-2017, 08:34 PM   #3
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I hope its like tomb raider for preteens
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Old 10-23-2017, 08:43 PM   #4
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That would be the safest take. Other than that I can't imagine how this came to be.

Probably gonna be better than Avatar, tho.
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Old 10-23-2017, 08:49 PM   #5
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We don't deserve to survive as a species when is that fucking asteroid gonna get here

I'm scared knowing how Bay normally handles members of the opposite sex in his films this could get real disturbing.
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Old 10-23-2017, 09:28 PM   #6
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What kind of car does Dora transform into?
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Old 10-23-2017, 11:01 PM   #7
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A Ford Explorer
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Old 10-23-2017, 11:11 PM   #8
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I'm thinking Lil JLo from TF5 will be Dora.

Bay's characterization of females characters do stay pretty, but they honestly do more in regard to plot than people think, no matter how silly the plots are.
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Old 10-24-2017, 12:18 AM   #9
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Maybe he thought it was called Dora the Explosion
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Old 10-24-2017, 06:15 AM   #10
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Can’t wait to not watch this
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Old 10-24-2017, 06:48 AM   #11
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Gritty reboot.

Audience participation, but more "Rocky Horror Picture Show" than little kids pointing at the plot device.

Boots will be some sort of giant CGI gorilla. Backpack/Map will be like Stark's Spider-Man suit. Swiper will actually be a human guy.
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Old 10-24-2017, 09:04 AM   #12
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I wonder how many awkward pauses will be included in this movie.
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Old 10-24-2017, 02:16 PM   #13
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I'll hang on until Ron Howard adapts the "Magic School Bus" or Milos Foreman attempts a gritty Carmen San Diego reboot.
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Old 10-24-2017, 06:37 PM   #14
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Swiper no swiping .
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Old 10-24-2017, 06:44 PM   #15
Destor
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In this version swiper did 3 tours in iraq

SNIPER NO SNIPING
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Old 10-24-2017, 06:44 PM   #16
Destor
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I recognize that joke was bad but I stand beside it
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Old 10-24-2017, 07:15 PM   #17
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Old 10-24-2017, 07:17 PM   #18
Destor
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Thats exactly what i had in my head
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Old 10-24-2017, 08:31 PM   #19
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I'd beat.
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Old 10-24-2017, 09:12 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kalyx triaD View Post
I'd beat.
What does this mean

What would you beat

?
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Old 10-24-2017, 09:13 PM   #21
Destor
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Im down to two options

1. His meat
2. That pussy
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Old 10-24-2017, 09:14 PM   #22
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Eitherway she is underage YOU MONSTER
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Old 10-24-2017, 09:19 PM   #23
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Pedophile triaD
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Old 10-24-2017, 09:20 PM   #24
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Quote:
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Eitherway she is underage YOU MONSTER
She's not any more lol
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Old 10-24-2017, 10:10 PM   #25
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Seanny One Ball View Post
I'll hang on until Ron Howard adapts the "Magic School Bus" or Milos Foreman attempts a gritty Carmen San Diego reboot.
I know that was a joke and all, but that I might actually be down for. Make it along the lines of the cartoon, not the game or gameshow, though... even though a Rockapella cameo would be neat. Just have them as bums singing on the street corner around a lighted oil drum somewhere.
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Old 10-24-2017, 10:20 PM   #26
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I would like to have sexual relations with Ariel Winter. Who appears in the youtube video. Because saying I'd have sex with Dora the cartoon child is not a thing I'd do.
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Old 10-24-2017, 10:33 PM   #27
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That video is from 5 years ago, she would have still been underage in that.
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Old 10-24-2017, 10:35 PM   #28
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It's not a time travel fuck.
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Old 10-24-2017, 10:36 PM   #29
Destor
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Yeah i get that. I was watchimg ET the other day and was like daaaaaaaaamn id smash drew Barrymore
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Old 10-24-2017, 10:37 PM   #30
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Imagine if your penis could go back in time (but just your penis)
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Old 10-24-2017, 10:55 PM   #31
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Hmm...

...I'd fuck up the past for sure.
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Old 10-25-2017, 01:21 AM   #32
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Joan of Arc would get it
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Old 10-25-2017, 02:25 AM   #33
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Yeah she's hot.
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Old 10-25-2017, 03:00 AM   #34
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Brotherhood of the Time Travelling Penis

Coming winter 2018
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Old 10-25-2017, 03:25 AM   #35
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Whoa! Whoa! Not too loud! this is a Michael Bay thread after all...
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Old 10-28-2017, 03:37 PM   #36
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I know that was a joke and all, but that I might actually be down for. Make it along the lines of the cartoon, not the game or gameshow, though... even though a Rockapella cameo would be neat. Just have them as bums singing on the street corner around a lighted oil drum somewhere.
They would need to sing the theme song over the credits at least. I have their CD and still listen to it every now and then.

Also bonus points for Greg Lee cameo.
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Old 10-28-2017, 03:45 PM   #37
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Maybe he thought it was called Dora the Explosion
Dora The Exploder
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Old 10-29-2017, 10:15 PM   #38
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They would need to sing the theme song over the credits at least. I have their CD and still listen to it every now and then.

Also bonus points for Greg Lee cameo.
Actually, if she hadn't passed, Lynne Thigpen could have been The Chief of ACME. Less gameshow host, more Amanda Waller, though.

Back to Dora... what are the running odds that Bay casts some barely legal chick so she resembles old school Lara Croft with modded Dora clothes?
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Old 10-30-2017, 12:49 AM   #39
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Very little. T5 had kids and his improv style fits with kids involved.
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Old 10-30-2017, 11:25 AM   #40
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Joan of Arc would get it
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Yeah she's hot.
The chick from Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure?
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