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Old 06-11-2017, 01:29 AM   #1
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Noid got bored and booked WrestleMania 34

I need to think of a word to describe this. It's somewhere between fantasy booking and predicting. I don't think it will all happen exactly like this, obviously -- so many things change -- but it's not exactly what I would do either. It's like producing my ideal WrestleMania card, within hypothetical and assumed parameters. So there's no ending the brand split, for example, even though I loathe it.

Anyway, the card:

Triple Threat Match for the Universal Championship
Roman Reigns (c) vs. Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose

WWE Championship
John Cena (c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Control of RAW
Triple H vs. Kurt Angle

Brock Lesnar vs. Samoa Joe

United States Championship
Randy Orton (c) vs. AJ Styles

Lumberjack Match: Champion vs. Champion
Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Alexa Bliss (c)

Money in the Bank Ladder Match
Kevin Owens vs. Shane McMahon

Intercontinental Championship
Jeff Hardy (c) vs. Finn Balor

The Miz vs. Bray Wyatt

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal
Featuring Braun Strowman, Matt Hardy, Baron Corbin, Big Show, Sheamus, Cesaro, Jinder Mahal, Rusev, The New Day, The Usos, Dolph Ziggler, Kalisto, Mojo Rawley

Cruiserweight Championship
Neville (c) vs. Johnny Gargano

Kickoff Match for the Fatal 4-Way Match for the SmackDown Tag Team Championship
Jinder Mahal & Rusev (c) vs. The New Day vs. The Usos vs. American Alpha

Kickoff Match for the RAW Tag Team Championship
The Revival (c) vs. Enzo Amore & Big Cass

The explanations:

* I know that a lot of people are expecting the break-up of Enzo & Cass, but I honestly think the WWE will keep them together -- they are just stronger together. They hold off on any big moment for them until WrestleMania, however, where they finally capture the RAW Tag Team Championship.
* The New Day win the SmackDown Tag Team Championship from The Usos, Jinder & Rusev win it from The New Day. Your classic clusterfuck for the belts. This happens on the pre-show, because some of these guys can do double-duty in the Battle Royal for their main card slot later. American Alpha walk out with the SmackDown Tag Team Championship after pinning one of The Usos with the Grand Amplitude. They don't participate in the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal, because they are taken out in a backstage interview segment by the former RAW Tag Team Champions, The Revival.

* Neville remains Cruiserweight Champion until WrestleMania, save for a brief period where Kalisto dethrones him that everybody forgets about until now and then. Johnny Gargano -- one of the best babyfaces in wrestling -- is 205 Live's greatest hope in dethroning The King of the Cruiserweights. He succeeds when he pins Neville with a Shining Wizard-style running knee.

* The Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal decides its fifth winner. All previous winners are competing for the crown this year. Matt Hardy is also "The Tortured Artist" adding some "star power" to thing. They do some comedy spots like a 3MB reunion. All the previous winners are tossed out by Braun Strowman. The final four are Braun Strowman, Jinder Mahal, Matt Hardy and Big E. Hardy tosses Jinder Mahal, but gets tossed by Strowman, to hopefully some good heat. Strowman goes after Big E, but Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods are back in and jump off the top, each being swatted out of the way by Strowman, he proceeds to toss out Kofi and Woods again, but he turns into the straps coming down on Big E, who body slams Strowman, following up with clotheslines, with a final one sending him over.

* The Miz has become the target of Bray Wyatt, who claims that he is everything wrong with Hollywood and American culture. Bray is quasi-face for this role, although I do expect that many fans will cheer The Miz. This is mainly to get both guys on the main card and not have them blend into the Battle Royal. Bray Wyatt gets the win here, finally cracking his WrestleMania losing streak.

* Jeff Hardy wins the Intercontinental Championship from The Miz. Finn Balor wants a title shot after failing to capture the Universal Title. Hardy is not one to back away from the challenge. There would no doubt be rumors of a heel turn from Balor here. I think that comes later, after Balor has already secured the IC Title. Balor wins here and the two shake hands after the match. This would be the first time we see The Demon since Hell in a Cell against Samoa Joe.

* Kevin Owens wins the Money in the Bank Ladder Match. He loses the US Title to AJ Styles after the Japanese tour. He goes on to have conflict with Shane McMahon. Either guy culd make it physical. Owens can perhaps even get cocky and make the suggestion that he puts his briefcase on the line against Shane. Owens retains the briefcase here, but there is a gasp everytime Shane touches it, because would you really be surprised?

* Besides the Battle Royal, the Women's Champion vs. Women's Champion is the only interpromotional match on the show. Charlotte is clearly the star on SmackDown and Alexa is clearly the star on RAW -- at WrestleMania we find out who is better, with all the other women surrounding the ring to ensure that no one takes a dive to avoid being pinned or submitting. Alexa looks to cheat, but Becky nails Bliss with her Money in the Bank briefcase, knocking her out in the ring. Charlotte pins Bliss and the SmackDown girls stand tall. Becky holds up Charlotte's hand, the other girls leave, and Becky locks in the Dis-Arm-Her on Charlotte and screams "I'm cashing in!" The referee wins the bell and Charlotte taps out, making Becky the new SmackDown Women's Champion.

* AJ Styles wins the US Title from Kevin Owens. At some point, Styles and Orton have a match for the belt, and Orton wins after catching Styles on a Phenomenal Forearm attempt with an RKO. The two have a rematch at WrestleMania, where AJ Styles manages to hit the Phenomenal Forearm and pin Orton to capture his second US Championship.

* Samoa Joe beats Brock Lesnar to win the Universal Title. Joe wins the belt, then defends it against Balor at three straight PPVs, and Brock actually puts over Strowman at SummerSlam and takes some time off to reconsider where he wants to be with wrestling. Brock enters the Royal Rumble with the intent to win and earn retribution against Samoa Joe. Brock looks like a beast early in the match, but instead of his next scheduled entrant, Joe actually makes his entrance and brawls with Brock, tossing him over the top rope in the process, continuing to brawl until they do a pull-apart. Joe defends the Universal Title against Roman Reigns at Fastlane and Reigns wins the belt after Brock hits the ring, F5s Joe, allowing Reigns to hit the Spear to win his first Universal Title. Joe vs. Brock II at WrestleMania. Joe wins when he chokes Brock out again.

* Got no clue where this Kurt Angle stuff is going on RAW, but most seem to think that it is supposed to lead to Stephanie McMahon making her return. What if this were the one "Attitude era" angle they put forward for WrestleMania, though? What could "ruin" Kurt Angle? He had an affair with Stephanie, of course, way back in 2000 (the angle they blew that marked the downward trend of the Attitude era). Triple H is, of course, pissed off. Stephanie McMahon is embarrassed. Cue Vince McMahon deciding that these two need to fight it out at WrestleMania in order to give Kurt time to prepare. This is where they no doubt do the Stephanie bump again -- although I have no clue how they get there. I imagine Kurt gets some back-up from a woman who helps him out -- Trish Stratus? Anyway, Triple H gets the win, because there is no way he is relinquishing control of the WWE, and it's the Sting thing again -- Triple H only loses to up-and-comers that are going to benefit the future of the business now. An ironic twist to the HHHegemony.

* John Cena wins the WWE Title on the July 4th SmackDown from Jinder Mahal. He retains the title through to the Japan special, where he beats someone (anyone) and then out comes Nakamura -- who beats AJ Styles earlier in the night (obviously before Styles has won the US Title, although I would be fine with a quick switch to Nakamura and a quick switch back -- meaning Styles wins his third US Title at Mania). Nakamura enters the Royal Rumble, and wins the entire thing, last eliminating Roman Reigns. Nakamura punches his ticket to WrestleMania, where The King of Strong Style challenges the 17-time WWE Champion. Hopefully the crowd is electric for this match, and the title change, after Nakamura hits one Kinshasa to become the new champ.

* Reigns wins the Universal Title at Fastlane after earning his shot by being the runner-up in the Royal Rumble. Reigns is cutting a promo on RAW. Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins all stand in the ring as the crowd do the "YES!" chant. The two smaller Shield members then work together to beat down Roman Reigns and we are off to the races. Triple H, now having full control of RAW, walks down as all three men are down during the course of the match. He nails Roman Reigns in the gut with a sledgehammer shot. Roman is down. Ambrose and Rollins look on confused. Triple H takes out two pairs of handcuffs and cuffs Reigns to the post with one. Ambrose freaks outand thinks that Rollins has rejoined The Authority. Ambrose goes nuts and takes out Rollins and then dives onto Triple H. Ambrose gets the second pair of cuffs and latches Rollins to the ropes. He grabs the sledgehammer. Rollins is trying to reason with Dean and explain that it wasn't him. Ambrose nails Rollins with the sledgehammer in the ribs several times, and then delivers one to the face of Rollins. He tosses the sledehammer to the side and then goes crazy on Rollins, who is now busted open Suddenly, Reigns appears from behind Ambrose -- he stops selling the gut, and removes a metal plate from his body armor that blocked the shot from Triple H. Ambrose turns around and realizes he's been had. Reigns nails Ambrose with it. Ambrose is now busted open, and pulls himself up on Rollins, realizing the mistake her has made, and turns around into a Spear. Rollins is hung up, bleeding after the sledgehammer shots from Ambrose -- as an almost Christlike figure, and Ambrose is lying broken on the canvas. Reigns holds up the Universal Title, he arms raised by Triple H -- The Chosen One is still the Universal Champion.
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Old 06-11-2017, 01:35 AM   #2
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Noid Post
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Old 06-11-2017, 01:37 AM   #3
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I think the appeal of a Shield triple threat has lost its "luster" already...... would have been huge had they built to it the year after the breakup.....

I think they would need to have a "few month long Shield reunion" to recharge its potential juices.........
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Old 06-11-2017, 01:49 AM   #4
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I think you're probably right. I don't know why, but I can see them changing direction from the Reigns vs. Lesnar rumors. Not as any demotion to Reigns, but more as a promotion to Joe and a different use for Brock.

Ambrose and Rollins are both fairly cold to me, but the WWE is in with them now. Seeing them hovering around the Universal Title at WrestleMania wouldn't be shocking, and I can see them being the guys that they try to add importance to at WrestleMania by throwing them into a title match.

More likely is that Reigns just wins clean though, with no heel turn going down. I suppose even more likely is the plan in place, with Reigns challenging Brock. It's hard to think of something stimulating for Rollins and Ambrose to do then, however.
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Old 06-11-2017, 07:44 AM   #5
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"Yeah let's have Reigns retire Undertaker this year at Mania and then next year we can have him face Dean Ambrose!! Matter of fact we could rehash the Battleground 2016 main event and involve Seth Freaking Rollins!!! That's much better than following the Taker win up with Brock Lesnar!"
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Old 06-11-2017, 11:52 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mike adamle View Post
"Yeah let's have Reigns retire Undertaker this year at Mania and then next year we can have him face Dean Ambrose!! Matter of fact we could rehash the Battleground 2016 main event and involve Seth Freaking Rollins!!! That's much better than following the Taker win up with Brock Lesnar!"
Snark aside i agree with this. The only logical way to go next year is reigns v lesnar
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Old 06-11-2017, 12:12 PM   #7
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I agree as well...... and we all know that WWE has never gone against logic.
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Old 06-11-2017, 12:16 PM   #8
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I agree as well...... and we all know that WWE has never gone against logic.
Valid. But i think its safe to say this is def their trajectory currently.
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Old 06-11-2017, 12:17 PM   #9
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Roman Reigns will be the host of rasslemania next year. No match. Makes sense.
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Old 06-11-2017, 12:45 PM   #10
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Yeah I think the WWE pretty much told us after making The Shield Triple Threat at Battleground that it's not a Mania-Worthy match, much less the main event. Plus, while it would've been great if they'd had the match at Mania 32 or 33 too much time has passed to put it on Mania now. Especially after having done it on a minor PPV/Network event.
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Old 06-11-2017, 02:27 PM   #11
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They're probably gonna have Alexa Bliss main event against Charlotte.
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Old 06-11-2017, 02:40 PM   #12
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Joke all you want but id be very into that or equivalent
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Old 06-11-2017, 02:41 PM   #13
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I agree as well...... and we all know that WWE has never gone against logic.
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Old 06-12-2017, 03:12 AM   #14
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Snark aside i agree with this. The only logical way to go next year is reigns v lesnar
I'll respond to you, because you're actually worth conversing with lol. I agree that it is more likely they go with Brock vs. Reigns, and I've learnt that the rumored direction is, more often than not, the route they will take. But I am not certain they go that direction.

* I always thought that Brock vs. Reigns II felt more like SummerSlam before it dropped that they were planning it for Mania.

* A one-year title reign is very long by even WWE masterplan standards in this day and age.

* The Reigns push isn't working. That's not to say that they will abandon it, but the dum-dee-dum rhythm of it could be interrupted by something that makes Vince jump. Not away from Reigns, mind you, but in a different direction.

* I'm not certain Brock will re-sign with WWE. There is no better option and he basically works a few dates here and there for a lot of money, so it'd be logical if he did re-sign, but I can see them moving him out of the tippy-top main event picture by WrestleMania, into one of the special attraction slots.

I haven't been watching RAW weekly, but when I heard about the Fatal 5-Way I was surprised to learn that almost every man and his dog was picking Finn Balor to win the thing. I learnt this was because they had Heyman cut that promo talking about how he would not be afraid of Brock Lesnar for whatever reason. It does sound like Brock vs. Balor was the planned direction, but then something was thrown into the works.

No one is expecting Joe to win at Great Balls of Fire. I'm not so certain. Not just because nothing they could do would shock me these days, but no one is expecting it. All the talk I've heard about the match is "well, we know how this is going to go" and with hope that Joe can make himself appealing in the loss. The way Heyman has set this up is beyond the usual filler program though.

It's possible that Joe wins the title for the Balor match, then drops it back to Brock in order to set up WrestleMania. I'm not going to be shocked if that happens either. I'm not even necessarily against Brock vs. Reigns -- they actually seem to be setting up Brock to be a pretty good babyface for it. I'm just not as certain as others seem to be that it is actually the match they do at Mania.

The WWE have invested a lot of time and money into Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose, so they are not going anywhere. In the WWE's mind they are stars. We just have to accept that pill and swallow it. Could they be wrestling each other for the IC Title at WrestleMania? Maybe two components of a Ladder Match? Sure -- that wouldn't surprise me. Given their salaries and just how important the WWE wishes them to be, I can see them being jammed into a thrown together title match that uses their history in lieu of any sort of proper storytelling. I mean, look at Wyatt vs. Orton from this year's WrestleMania: they're not exactly above just saying "fuck it, this is the title match."
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Old 06-12-2017, 03:13 AM   #15
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TL;DR: Brock vs. Reigns is, of course, most likely, unless you're one of those people who doesn't believe it until the match is announced. I don't think it's the lock people think it is though. We shall see.
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Old 06-12-2017, 11:24 AM   #16
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I can't think of a bigger waste of Angle's possible last match than making him be in one of those 20 minute long "epic" HHH Mania matches which are really just total slogs.

So that means you're probably right.
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Old 06-12-2017, 11:55 AM   #17
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Yeah, the Shield triple threat doesn't work for Reigns at this point. There are ways out of Reigns vs Lesnar without it feeling like they wasted Taker's final match. Namely, Cena vs Reigns. Especially if there's a title on the line. I wouldn't mind Reigns winning the Universal Title and then Cena winning the rumble. Everyone assumes Cena's going after the WWE Title but then he's like "If Reigns wants to be the big dog, he's gotta go through me first." At WrestleMania you've got Cena going for the record and Reigns attempting to officially become the new face of the company.

I'd also like Cena to win because he'll finally get the crowd adoration he's deserved for years and it would suck to watch that finally happen at a WrestleMania only for him to lose to a new guy who's gonna get shit on for years. I really wanna see Cena close out a WrestleMania with an old school face pop after winning a match.
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Old 06-12-2017, 03:08 PM   #18
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I've said it elsewhere but I wouldn't mind Lesnar vs. Balor ending with a Lesnar win by a narrow margin, with a re-match at Mania with Balor donning the paint for the first time since his return. Beast vs. Demon.

Or if we must go with Reigns vs. Lesnar lets do something interesting and not just have The Big Dog send Lesnar out of WWE at the end of his contract. One idea I had was to set the match up and have Reigns begin to hint that he knew exactly how to beat Brock because he'd been given some advice from Paul. Have some mistrust begin between Heyman and Brock with Paul denying the accusation, a wedge developing between the pair to the point where Lesnar doesn't want Heyman at ringside for his match.

At Mania, a back and forth war or attrition ends with the Authors of Pain debuting and helping Roman lay waste to Brock when he won't stay down. This gives us a sort of nu-Shield given the aesthic similarities with AOP, but with a clear leader/underling scenario. Of course the "Paul" Roman was referring to was Ellering, not Heyman.
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Old 06-12-2017, 03:11 PM   #19
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The two guys who beat the Undertaker at Wrestle Mania is how they will build the match. IMO
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Old 06-12-2017, 03:47 PM   #20
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Still thinking Joe V Brock II would be waaay more interesting than trying still force reigns some more.

Why can't Roman just go for the IC?
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Old 06-12-2017, 10:16 PM   #21
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I can't think of a bigger waste of Angle's possible last match than making him be in one of those 20 minute long "epic" HHH Mania matches which are really just total slogs.

So that means you're probably right.


The only way I don't see this happening is if Kurt Angle doesn't get "medically cleared."
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Old 06-12-2017, 10:19 PM   #22
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Yeah, the Shield triple threat doesn't work for Reigns at this point. There are ways out of Reigns vs Lesnar without it feeling like they wasted Taker's final match. Namely, Cena vs Reigns. Especially if there's a title on the line. I wouldn't mind Reigns winning the Universal Title and then Cena winning the rumble. Everyone assumes Cena's going after the WWE Title but then he's like "If Reigns wants to be the big dog, he's gotta go through me first." At WrestleMania you've got Cena going for the record and Reigns attempting to officially become the new face of the company.

I'd also like Cena to win because he'll finally get the crowd adoration he's deserved for years and it would suck to watch that finally happen at a WrestleMania only for him to lose to a new guy who's gonna get shit on for years. I really wanna see Cena close out a WrestleMania with an old school face pop after winning a match.
I'm fine with that. Honestly, I could see it as a unification of the title belts. They've never used that gimmick at a WrestleMania, and if RAW's ratings keep dipping, I can see Vince being "all hands on deck." Still, he'd probably try to keep both belts around for a couple of years like he did with the World Heavyweight Title after the brand split had ended in 2011/2012 with the move to the 3-hour RAWs.
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Old 06-12-2017, 10:21 PM   #23
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The two guys who beat the Undertaker at Wrestle Mania is how they will build the match. IMO
Yeah, probably. I can see Reigns winning the Rumble and it just being background noise for the usual Mania build. But I'm thinking they give the Rumble to a SmackDown guy to pop the crowd, and Reigns just challenges because he's The Big Dog or whatever.

Right now, I do think that Cena vs. Nakamura has a good chance at being the WWE Title match. That's if Nakamura manages to get into gear and impress the people that matter. I don't necessarily think it will close the show, but I can see it being the SmackDown title match.
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Old 06-12-2017, 10:25 PM   #24
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Still thinking Joe V Brock II would be waaay more interesting than trying still force reigns some more.

Why can't Roman just go for the IC?
I think Joe's got a really good shot at winning the Universal Title at the PPV. Even if it's just to drop it back to Brock and be the Balor opponent. Something about the way Heyman has helped set it up makes me think he's going to be pushing for the shock Joe win -- even if the idea is just to give Brock something interesting to do, as opposed to the year-long title reign.

But if the match delivers and people are buzzing about it, I don't see why it is too far out of the question for Vince to be like "Well, he's stepped up and that was pretty good -- let's make it a Mania program."

Reigns isn't going to be abandoned. They have decided he is their new top star and he is being paid like their top star. I don't know how true it is, but I heard he was signed to like a 10-year contract. He's not going mid-card unless he wants a break, and that will probably be in the quieter parts of the year. Creatively, I get what you're saying, but I think he's in the RAW title picture come Mania; I'm just not sure it's going to be Brock/Reigns.
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