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WWE Staff Forced To Shoot Aggressive Wrestler After Child Climbs Into Steel Cage

Holy fucking shit! This happened down the street from me. Was Big Show on something? Unreal!

Quote:

INDIANAPOLIS—Saying they were left with no other choice given the imminent peril of the situation, World Wrestling Entertainment officials confirmed they were forced to kill one of their own stars Friday when a 7-year-old boy wandered into the steel cage enclosure of an aggressive wrestler.

Beloved two-time WWE champion Big Show was reportedly shot dead after the emergency response team at the Indiana Farmers Coliseum made a split-second decision to take out the nearly 400-pound dominant male wrestler, who is said to have appeared aggravated and hostile, causing those present to fear for the small child’s safety.

“Last night, after determining he posed a clear threat to a young boy who had entered the steel cage, we chose to end the life of one of our wrestlers,” said WWE spokesperson Chris Bellitti, who added that the security guards who opened fire had followed protocol, assessing the body language and vocalizations of the 45-year-old wrestler to evaluate the danger he presented. “It is a tragedy anytime something like this happens, but luckily we can say a child is alive today thanks to the swift and appropriate measures taken by our WWE staff.”

http://theonion.tumblr.com/post/1619...ssive-wrestler

Dicks out for Big Show

RIPpedBig Show

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The Onion is actually funny for once

lol i really was gotten for a spit second. Then i clicked on it from Yahoo and realized

I know right?? Lex killed this kid man. Fuck Lex!

What the fuck?! Surely this can't be for real? What was the kid even doing in the ring? I can understand having armed security, but what the hell?

Let's see how many take this post seriously.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lock Jaw (Post 4980411)

Dicks out for Big Show

Is it bad I thought less meme and more Val Venis laughing at him at the urinal?

Big Show should have went into the business himself and no sold WWE security.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rammsteinmad (Post 4980542)

What the fuck?! Surely this can't be for real? What was the kid even doing in the ring? I can understand having armed security, but what the hell?

Let's see how many take this post seriously.

It's an article off The Onion. Fake news is fake.

If they would have only waited a minute before they shot him, I'm sure Big Show would have turned face and this could have all been avoided.

Quote:

Originally Posted by #1-wwf-fan (Post 4980759)

That's one.

LOL well shit. Fooled by the old hidden text gag. Can't believe I noticed all that extra space in the quoted post and couldn't figure that out. Unfuckingbelievable.